I'm beginning to wonder if I should keep a count of how many of my blog posts start off like that. If I was a betting man, which I'm not, I get the feeling I could make some money out of it (*plots plans of world domination*).
There has been a reason for my lack of posting. Firstly, B has been ill. She got conjunctivitis and followed it up by a cough and a cold, which, being the caring, sharing baby she is, she duly gave to anyone who came within a few feet of her, myself and W included. Rumours of a restriction order being issued to prevent her from passing it on to anyone else by luring people close enough with her cuteness and then pouncing are unsubstantiated at this point in time. It wouldn't surprise me one little bit though.
Here, I have to be completely honest, I am a complete worry guts. Some people are just like that. I didn't deal with the illness thing brilliantly. I'm not entirely sure why though. I knew that she was basically fine as she still laughed, babbled and shot around the floor at a million miles an hour - just with snot flying everywhere. I just wanted her to get better and if there was a way for me to take it all away and give it to myself, I surely would have done that. Well, partly wish granted I guess as I felt completely rough before, during and after the Easter weekend. This meant that not only did I have to take time off of work to look after her (understandably, the child minder wouldn't take her), but I had to take a day off work myself and work the post Easter week feeling less than functional.
Now this is what frustrates me no end. I am on a six-month probation at the moment (more about this later). Any time I take off that is not part of my annual leave, I do not get paid for. I firmly believe that if you are ill you should not come to work - especially if you are 'lucky' enough to receive sick pay. It's something that I used to practice when I was a manager myself at my last company - I would actively send people home if they were under the weather (cue my old HR department slamming a blood red 'NOT MANAGEMENT MATERIAL' stamp on my personal file. I'm not suggesting for a second that if you wake up in the morning with a bit of a splutter that you should lunge for the phone and put your best croaky voice, having licked the carpet for added effect. Yet, I lost count of the amount of people in this office who were clearly ill and proceeded to charitably pass their germs around the office as if it were some sort of fundraising event. Oh for the want of something like duvet days!
Before people start pointing and jabbing at me with sharp sticks, calling me 'hypocrite', I believe my case is different as I couldn't afford to not be at work and the days over this six months where I have been at my worst, I have not come in. For someone that is, I believe, a reasonably healthy individual, I have been ill a little too much since I started my new job. There is a big part of me that fears that the 'D' word is rearing it's ugly head again and that's why I feel so run down. Of course, I'm sure the long days contribute to this and I'm fighting it all off with all the strength I can round up.
Still, my job hunt continues, even if, to date, nothing has come of it. To top it all off, my probation period has been extended for a further three months, due to the extra time it took to get my 'working head' on after being off for so long. I'm not bitter about it at all - I just felt a little down for half a day following the meeting with my Manager. I felt that I was letting W and B down.
It was a positive meeting however and my Manager said that if my performance currently was like that consistently over the whole six months, then I would have passed with flying colours. Trying to get positives out of what could be perceived as negative experiences is a good example of the fight I referred to a couple of paragraphs up.
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